TORN APART (2006)

I’m so sad... and I feel so bad -
‘cause I just don’t know...
Why would he go?

He became so angry, so cold, and so mad...
He said he wasn’t happy with the life that we had -
but that life, it was ours - it was mine, and his...
And this thing we’re facing now... it is, what it is.

But just what it is, I’m not really sure -
for this thing that is ailing us... is there a cure?
Can we find our way back, from these depths of despair...
Can we find, once again, that love and that care?

I don’t know, where we should go -
from where we now both stand...
All that’s real, is what I feel -
I want to take his hand.

I want him back, like he used to be -
when he held me tight and desired me...
I want us back, the way we were -
to be his only love, that’s what I’d prefer.

Our family, it means so much to me...
What does it mean to him?
Some days seem so hopeful - like it’s all meant to be...
And some others, the light seems so dim.

All I can do, is hope and pray -
that he will awake and find his way...
That he’ll find his way back to the family we’ve made -
and realize the price we have paid.

God, give us strength, to go on without him -
and give me faith, though I still doubt him.

If we must now, be apart -
let me trust, now, in his heart,
he can be a better man...
For his son - I hope he can.
***

Lord, Help Me (4-19-2012)

Lord, please tell me, how I know...
If it is or isn’t so
that You were Jesus,
and Jesus, You -
anymore than we are, too.
I’ve always felt You in my heart,
and always felt like such a part
of a world where once I did belong...
But the one I lived in felt so wrong.
People talk and people preach -
but no one knows just what to teach.
They say they do,
when they really don’t...
They promise to do things,
they really won’t.
People lie and cheat and steal -
and then they tell you what to feel,
what to think and how to live...
Few remember how to give.
Fewer less, even, remember You,
unless they sit in their church pew.
They spout righteousness,
despite their sins -
and go back home to sin again -
never giving a second thought,
to Your presence,
as their follies are wrought.
Help me Lord, to know what to do...
And help me, I pray, to teach what is true.

BEGIN AGAIN

There comes a time in all our lives,
when hopelessness sets in;
when all seems lost and we find we ought,
begin our lives again.

We must rise up when we are down,
in order to stand and fight;
for in the darkest night, you will find,
it’s easiest to see the light.

No matter where life leads us
In good times and in bad,
the love of God still feeds us...
whether happy love, or sad.

Through the best times He has talked to me,
as I went through my day;
 and in the worst times, He’s walked with me,
 though I’ve felt far away.

I thank the Lord, for this life I lead,
though far from Him, I stray;
Still He stays with me, through adversity,
and comforts me, day by day.
***

THE RIDE

As I ride my stallion, to the mountain top -

reaching for the sky...

I find myself, lost in thought -

wondering how and why.

How did He do it, and why does He care?

And I ask Him that, when I get up there -

I dismount my horse - and I stop and stare...

For the beauty that surrounds me,

simply, just, astounds me -

all the sounds, around me -

every where.

I feel Him, deep within me...

Stirring something in me -

something, of which,

I am not yet aware.

I hear His Words, in the song of the birds;

and they fill the mountain air...

And the afternoon breeze, as it blows through the trees,

is warning me - to beware.

He summons me, to notice, the spider and bug...

And then, He gently gives me, a warm, internal hug.

The spider, He says, is cunning and sly -

forever plotting, to trap the fly.

And many people, lay traps too -

hoping they will soon catch you.

So as you ride, on life’s rough trail,

be sure to watch your gait...

For there are those, with tooth and nail -

who skillfully, lie, in wait.

And along the way, you will find,

those who like to be unkind...

Who laugh and tease,

those on their knees -

while they,

can’t make up their own mind.

Then God tells me,

He won’t leave me -

when all the others don’t believe me -

and assures me, He will teach me,

right, from wrong.

He promises to guide me -

and to always stay beside me -

as the cricket’s hum their slow, melodic song.

And as I descend the mountain,

passing by a fountain -

I feel blessed to be alive...

upon the earth.

And I thank God, for all His gifts to me -

and tell Him to do as He wishes, with me -

for I was His servant, already...

at my birth.

I like to think, He understands...

What He always meant to me -

but I wanted to do, what I wanted to do -

and to be, what I wanted to be.

And so, in my youth, I strayed a bit,

from that straight and narrow path...

But I like to think, He understood -

and maybe, even laughed.

And through the years,

as I grew older...

His hold on me - well, it grew bolder.

And though I resisted, to some extent,

I never fought too hard -

because, after all, it is God’s game;

and He holds the ultimate card.

And as I remember, those wonderful days...

My life has changed, in so many ways -

before, I was strong,

and now, I am weak...

It didn’t take long,

to turn me humble and meek.

I can no longer get upon my horse -

for gravity is a mighty force.

With broken leg, I sit and write -

to tell this tale to you...

Somewhat prepared, but still, not quite -

for what it is, I must do.

My ride, is not yet over...

Onward, I go, still -

on an endless search,

for the perfect church -

climbing, up life’s hill.

The Mormon Church, disappointed me...

The Universal Life Church has anointed me.

But I feel, that God ordained me, long ago.

The Church just never knew me -

they said, God wouldn’t, talk to me...

But how in the world, does anybody know?

I know God, as well as any man -

as well, as any human can.

He walks with me,

and I with Him...

(when I can keep that pace).

And I will always be...

whether beside, or behind,

On His team - while I’m riding life’s race.

So, though I may not belong,

to a church -

right or wrong...

I long, to belong to Him.

And whenever I ask,

“Lord, show me my task...”

He answers, with vigor and vim.

And He tells me to write,

both day and night -

He tells me write... about Him.

And now that I know, the bulk of His plan -

I will watch where I go, and do what I can...

And though I am scared, of crowds, just a bit -

I’m not scared of any man.

For God is with me - this is it -

I can do it...

I know that I can.

Then He fills me with words,

about life and death...

He sharpens my senses,

and halts my breath -

but only, for a moment or two.

And with my hands shaking,

at the task I am facing,

He tells me, again...

what to do.

He says to reach out, to those who are lost;

Who would sell their soul, at any cost -

to the young and confused...

and the scared - and the tossed.

To tell them, they control their own life’s ride -

we can live with humility, or live with pride.

Our body is ours -

to do with, as we please;

as we traverse this physical plain.

With doors to open,

 and doors to close;

there’s so much to lose...

yet, so much to gain.

So walk through any door you want...

Some will help you - others, will taunt.

And if you get stuck,

or lose your way -

all you have to do...

Is stop for a minute; take time to pray -

and God will rescue you.

Yes, I like to remember,

those rides in September...

As the leaves crunched beneath my steed.

And when I recall,

those days in the Fall...

I thank God, for planting that seed.

Enjoy the ride.

***

BUSY WORLD

Things to do... places to be.

Things to take care of and people to see.

Busy you, busy me...

Imagine where the world would be,

without Him to guide our spirit -

a voice of Wisdom - if you can hear it.

Running here, and running there...

Always running, everywhere.

On the go - in a hurry to die -

never really knowing why.

We push ahead, on our life’s journey...

Though the path is rocky and sometimes thorny -

and we forge our way, through good times and bad -

for the most part, being thankful, for the good times we’ve had.

But we don’t understand, the one thing we should...

that the bad times are what teach us, more than the good.

We should be most thankful for those difficult days -

for they have helped us in many ways.

Durations of despair, lasting any length...

It is those times, that build spiritual strength.

Most of us don’t notice - as we crawl in our hole -

but what we do, on days of sadness, is look into our soul.

Whether you are aware, or not...

You maintain a special spot.

God is present in your life, as much as you allow -

But regardless of acceptance, He loves you anyhow.

This life is just an experience... to teach us right from wrong.

It’s His way of building our character - letting us struggle, our whole life long.

But His world is always waiting...

The pains of this world, abating -

While constantly, we struggle and worry...

Why are we in such a hurry?

Life is too short to be callous and cold -

before we all know it, we will be old.

And the thing God hopes, that we will all learn,

as we go through this life - and suffer and yearn -

is that the very most important part,

comes from matters of the heart...

It’s that we love, that we nurture... we learn to care.

It is simply to know that He is there.

The first lesson in life, as a babe, in warm arms -

we learn that kind person will keep us from harm.

And the one thing that’s certain...

The one thing we know... is that, that love will always be there.

And the love that they give us - it helps us to grow -

and it shapes us in ways we couldn’t possibly know.

God’s love, does the same, in a spiritual way -

“Intuition” or “instinct”... “gut feelings”, you say?

That is God... urging you, every day -

to do what is right - to do what is good.

Imploring you always, to do what you should.

Though God’s arms are not flesh... they are a safe mesh -

to keep us from falling too far.

Throughout your life... in melee and strife,

He watches over you, wherever you are.

Opportunities, He presents, when needs arise -

and discipline, He provides, to make us wise.

In this busy world, as we go through each day -

hurrying, worrying, and pushing Him away -

He loves us, regardless... of what we do, or don’t, say.

But we should try to thank Him, once in a while, anyway.

***

Where is My Mind?

As I sit here tonight and rethink the day,

there were so many things, I wanted to say...

Of course, I can’t remember ten minutes ago -

so how in the world, will I ever know...

The thoughts that came earlier -

just hours ago?

They leave a curious gnawing, and a humbled ego.

Sometimes I wonder, why my mind leaves me...

And then I worry that no one believes me.

I’m young - it’s true - but I’m a mother too...

And that, in itself, can age you.

Four children, I’ve born -

and kissed every morn’

and years, I have watched, roll away.

I married too young...

Never could hold my tongue -

and asked God for strength every day.

And when my mind fails me,

and this body ails me...

I just have to remember to pray.

Then God reassures me -

comforts and lures me -

to play the game, His way.

He tells me, He will sustain me,

and strengthen my body again...

And He will not restrain me,

from straying, a bit, now and then.

But then, in the same breath,

I hear Him ask me -

to try harder every day...

To keep Him, on my mind,

and my troubles behind -

and to watch the things I say.

For we are living in a dreadful age -

when God is thought of,

less and less...

And before we turn another page,

we must caution, persuade and press.

I am frightened, for mankind,

so there are some things that I must stress...

For, if we all, lose sight of Him,

the world will be a mess.

I’m afraid, my friend,

it’s just a matter of time,

before the light, goes dim...

So help me, to remind the world,

where we would be without Him -

if not for the love God has for us,

even when we forget to pray...

So have faith - be cheerful;

and never fearful...

God will find a way.

***

CRAZY?

I love it, when I hear from God;

as oft times, I know I do.

Some people really think I’m odd,

but others hear Him, too;

How do I hear Him,

you might want to know?

He speaks to me,

every where I go.

In the afternoon breeze,

or a morning rain -

He speaks to me, in the back of my brain.

He speaks to my heart,

and makes it race -

and, sometimes, He speaks to me,

face to face.

You say, that sounds crazy?

I once thought so, too.

But give Him a chance;

He’ll get hold of you!

***

WHO AM i?

As I pass the mirror,

I stop and stare -

who is that person, standing there?

I hardly know her anymore,

that person, who I was before.

She looks at me,

with those trusting eyes -

and a soul that’s seven times her size.

And the more I look,

the more she changes;

The figure, before me - it rearranges.

She stretches and turns,

as for wisdom, she yearns -

And all at once, I realize;

It is me, that I see -

looking back nervously;

And regardless, what the mirror shows,

This soul that I feel -

that’s what is real;

Not what this body knows.

I am, who I am;

For God made me, she.

I am her.  She is me.

We are one - me and she.

And I believe I AM who God wants me to be.

So, inside-out, I will walk,

through this world on my own;

Small and scared -tired and timid -

but not ever really alone.

With my soul exposed,

I wear this shell;

As I walk through life -

and go, through Hell.

And the girl that I was,

I always will be;

Even though, it’s not her, now -

I see looking at me.

In a body that’s aging, withered and worn -

with clothing, now baggy, tattered and torn;

I pour out my soul, so that other’s might learn -

that they, too, should teach -

when it comes to their turn.

And no matter what image,

the mirror might see,

I trust, in just this one thing;

That I am, exactly,

where He wants me to be;

and through all this, my soul, He will bring.

***

My Life is Yours

My life is in Your hands;

But no one understands;

they think I’ve lost my mind;

why are they so unkind?

I once gave my life to You;

saying, “do as You wish to do” -

and You have led me Here;

A far, far cry, from There.

But my friends and family,

they wonder, about me.

My grandma used to pray,

That I would find my way…

Back to the church I left -

but they don’t want my gift;

Women can not preach -

That is what They teach !

But Lord, I always knew You,

deep within my heart;

And I knew my strength was through You -

I was Yours, right from the start.

***

Take Time to Pray

Do you ever feel the need to pray,

but hurry on along your way;

All the while, to your self, you say,

“I’ll pray, later on, today.”

But, nighttime comes,

as it always does;

And everything is,

as it always was.

And exhausted, from your day of labor -

and worrying about, your bills and your neighbor -

what things you have,

and what things you don’t,

what you’ll get to do and what you won’t;

You drop on your bed,

all clean and fed -

and forget, that your prayers, haven’t yet been said.

But, there comes a day  of reckoning -

when we must answer,  to God’s beckoning.

And eventually,

you’ll bow your knee -

and see, that He is wise.

For He has a way,

each and every day -

of opening someone’s eyes.

Verily, there comes a season,

when, without rhyme or reason;

On a night, dark and still -

you’ll realize, God’s Will;

As it hits you -

He is here!

So, you bow your head,

and humbly say,

“Lord, I thank you, for today.

Please help me through tomorrow;

and each day after, that I borrow -

until I come, to see you again;

I understand, I can’t know, when.

Stay close beside me -

protect me and guide me -

and help me to stay strong.

Influence my choices;

Teach me your voices -

and fill my heart, with song.

You fill my days,

in so many ways;

With small reminders of You.

The warm sun’s rays. -

And the cool evening haze;

And the satiny morning dew.

So Lord, forgive me when I stumble;

Do your best, to keep me humble.

But know, that when I stumble - it’s because;

You were gracious enough -

(though, your lessons are very tough)

to free me, from your laws.”

And as you finish the prayer of a sinner,

the width of your worries becomes much thinner -

Then your tired eyes will close,

as, your weary heart then slows;

And you surrender yourself to slumber.

Then by God’s great power,

in that mystic hour;

You’ll dream, magical dreams, without number.

He’ll speak to you,

in your dreams that night -

at least, He will;

if you ask Him right.

I, like you, have fought my whole life long;

Sometimes, I feel weak,

when I desire to feel strong.

But I’ve learned, my weakness goes away -

when I remember,

to take the time,

to pray.

***

Remember Him

Alone, I sit... but not alone;

in my bed at night.

We talk for hours, without a phone;

sometimes 'til morning light.

The conversation is quiet;

there's no need for verbal speech.

Everyone should try it -

for God has much to teach.

But He can only reach you,

when you reach out to Him;

and if you let Him teach you,

your life won't seem so dim.

He is always with us -

always very near;

and anything you wish to discuss,

He's always glad to hear.

It's not that hard to talk to God,

He knows your everyt hought.

You really shouldn't think it odd,

to speak out loud, or not.

For, as long as He is on your mind,

He is connected to you;

You'll feel Him beside, in front and behind.

Remember Him, in ALL that you do!

***

It's All About Him

God is in control...

Yet we are in ‘control’ –

Every day it’s us...

But evermore, it’s Him.

He speaks to us each day...

Yet we go on our way -

looking at ourselves -

filling up our shelves...

And forgetting about Him.

Sometimes I feel so lost...

Yet He paid such a cost -

to give this gift to us...

I can never forget about Him.

He knows that I am weak...

That I’m afraid to speak -

yet still, he trusts in me...

So I must tell about Him.

I don’t want to be thought deranged...

But it all seems to be so arranged -

the way that life began...

It’s all one big plan -

and it’s all because of Him.

It scares me to be known...

I feel naked and alone -

speaking out loud -

in front of a crowd...

So I just want to write about Him.

More and more He urges me...

Every year, the more I see -

that it’s my duty - my debt to pay...

To tell the world about Him.

***

Nature’s Musicians

The music of nature, fills the air;

Chirping crickets, every where -

birds that sing and leaves that whistle;

grass blades rub, across the thistle.

The locust buzz is shrill and deep,

and lulls me to a peaceful sleep.

Where, in my dreams, I hear it, still;

On it goes, and on, until...

The musicians, one by one, sleep too -

but there’s still much more for them to do.

Tomorrow is another day,

and once again, they will play.

***

Inspirational SHORT POEMS

SPEAK TO MY HEART

Speak to my heart, Lord, loud and clear...

speak to my heart, that I may hear.

To hear you, Lord, is all I want;

every night and day.

To hear you, Lord, without a doubt;

knowing what you say.

***

THE BIBLE

The Bible is a book, that teaches right from wrong -

and helps to keep us close to God, our whole life long.

***

WHICH WAY?

Under, over - down or up... which way should I go?

Left or right, or right or left - I really do not know.

If I just go straight ahead, how can I go wrong?

I'll let God lead me, protect and feed me... 

and fill my heart with song.

***
Forever Yours

Lord, I am forever Yours;

Please help me find my way.

Life’s hallway, holds so many doors;

Forgive me, when I stray.

Forever, I will love You;

Forever, I will praise -

Your Son, Your Name;

One and the same.

Humbly Yours,

‘till the end of days.

***

Spring Grass

How is it, that the grass does grow,

after it’s Winter sleep?

I’ll tell you how - because I know,

by the company, I keep.

His power is strong,

and though Winter is long;

By His warmth and His light,

the grass comes back to life -

as if wakened by a song of birth.

His energy soars,

deep into it’s pores -

and it gently springs forth, from the earth.

It drinks of the dew -

and rises anew-

just as Jesus rose, that Spring;

And it gets stronger each day -

in every way -

as it listens, to birds, while they sing.

***

Children's Inspirational SHORT POEMS

SILVER LINING

In the orange light, of the day's sunset,

a silver lining glows...

encircling the cloud, with a light bright and proud.

that silver lining shows;

it fills my heart with joy, like every girl and boy,

and sends tingles to my toes.

***

THUNDER

With the power of just His word, thunder rolls across the sky;
It hushes every bird, as its rumble rushes by.
Like a God-almighty sneeze...
Need we wonder why?

***

ICY WIND

Icy wind blows...

it freezes your nose -

chills down to your toes;

and that's how it goes!

***

RAIN CLOUDS

Cloud upon cloud; tuft upon tuft...

Fill up the clear-blue sky.

Shouting out loud, all rumbly and puffed...

"Get inside if you want to stay dry!"

***